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There was an English steelworker who had dreamed of being a farmer. So he scrimped and saved for 15 years and then he bought a little sheep farm on a mountain in Wales Brecon Beacons.
He went about farming and discovered that he loved it as much as he thought he would. But he was lonely, so one evening he bicycled 10 miles to the closest pub. It was a rustic little place on a rocky outcropping. The only other customers were two older men in a corner playing dominoes.
"Where are all the women?" the new farmer asked.
"You'll not find any women in these parts, I'm afraid! Not in many years!" replied one of the old men.
"So what do you do for, uh, companionship?"
"When the urge overwhelms you, you just grab a sheep and give it a good shagging! No shame in it-- we all have to do it."
The new farmer said that was disgusting and he would never do it, drained his pint and went home. But a month later, he was in a sheep field and feeling so randy that he couldn't take it any more. He grabbed a sheep, got on his knees and starting humping it. Suddenly, a peal of laughter broke out behind him. He spun his head around and saw the old farmers, who were cutting across his field and were now pointing, laughing and pounding their knees.
"You said that everyone around here shags sheep!" yelled the new farmer as he pulled his pants back up.
"Yeah," replied one of the old men. "But we don't fuck the ugly ones!"
I must be gettin' old... I still think baseball is cool.