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Saturday joke

3 Replies | 193 Views
On 09/29/2012 11:07 AM in General
Bad, I know...

What did the bulimic girl’s boyfriend say whenever he heard her in the bathroom after a meal?

“Keep it down in there!”
I must be gettin' old... I still think baseball is cool.

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Pfile Nickname yisman
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09/29/2012 11:20 AM
I thought this was pretty funny:

4. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too." Fuck off. What good is a goddamn cake you can't eat?
5. When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?
6. When people say, while watching a movie "Did you see that?" No dicknose, I paid $7.50 to come to the theater and stare at the ceiling up there.
7. The radio ad "Hi, I'm Jeff Healey from the Jeff Healey Band. Don't drink and drive. I don't". Well, I hope you don't drive sober either Mr. Healey. You're blind for God's sake!
8. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice, did ya there buddy?
9. When something is "new and improved", which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.
10. When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you now how fast you were going? You should know asshole you pulled me over!
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Pfile Nickname bobalou
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09/29/2012 11:26 AM
This is great....

Yisman... one of my pet peeves is stupid questions... I worked for the public for years and trust me they can say some stupid stuff.. This one got me almost every day.

The doors open at 6am... we are inside working... and people walk into the building and say "Are you open?" Do you know how much I wanted to say.. NO... we just left the doors unlocked to see who'd walk in.

Women are Angels.
And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...
Usually on a broomstick but we're flexible like that
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Pfile Nickname thehitman
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10/07/2012 11:29 PM
You guys are great
Never, ever criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes........for at that point they will be a mile away. And you'll have their shoes !
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